Alasdair Donaldson (who does not have time to read this blog) has signed a new contract with Loughborough and will remain at the club for at least the next twelve months, the lufbra echo understands. The news comes as a major victory for George Gandy's PA as insiders have told of "massive concessions" made by the Loughborough set up.
A source close to the negotiation team told the echo that Alasdair was "now to have an assistant to take charge of milk". It is hoped that this will free Donaldson up to spend more time trialling and selecting teas as well as focusing on perfecting a "comprehensive system for the storage and dispensing of paper clips".
Donaldson's decision to stay put will come as a surprise to many as he was linked to several "leading institutions" including the Bolton Institute of Higher Education who were prepared to offer him "complete control" of the kettle. A source close to Donaldson said that Loughborough was "the clear choice" and that the Scot was "very happy" in the East Midlands.
Just a couple of months ago, Donaldson's future couldn't have been more uncertain after his April Fools joke went disastrously wrong and he was quizzed by UKA chiefs over the cash for emails scandal. However, Loughborough sources have told the echo that these incidents are "now in the past" and that Donaldson was the "man for the moment".
Showing posts with label Gandy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gandy. Show all posts
Sunday, 12 June 2011
Saturday, 21 May 2011
TWITTER RUMOUR UNTRUE SAYS DONALDSON
Alasdair Donaldson has been forced to deny speculation on social networking site Twitter that he had taken out an injunction preventing the media from revealing details about his private life. The tea and coffee man - who does not have time to read this blog - rejected accusations that he had conducted a seven month affair with a kettle. "I have never and would never do such a thing" thundered George Gandy's PA "I am perfectly happy with my tea pot and so would never be drawn into betraying that". The Twitter user - who attracted over 25,000 followers in just six hours - said in a separate tweet that Donaldson had played "kinky games" with the kettle including "filling it up with milk" and "boiling it with no liquid inside".
Loughborough was left reeling from other salacious rumours from the mystery correspondent. One tweet said: "A Lufbra [sic] sports scholar did not spend the last six weeks out on the town and actually did some training". Another claimed to have evidence that Stephen Emery was "drinking supplement drinks straight from the fridge" whilst one more accused Pete Matthews of "having a sound dress sense". A spokesman for the University sports programme "wholeheartedly denied" the "malicious gossip" that was being spread. Stopping short of naming a suspect, the source confirmed that they believed the tweets had "come from the West Midlands".
The revelations could not have come at a worse time for Loughborough as the East Midlands town gears up for the biggest event of the year tomorrow - the Loughborough International. "Everything goes ahead as planned" an insider told the echo "but we have cancelled all press conferences".
Sunday, 15 May 2011
PETE MATTHEWS: THE SEARCH FOR REDEMPTION
The Sunday Interview: Pete Matthews
Branded a 'national joke' by his peers, lambasted by his coaches and ignored by selectors. The Blackburn Harrier talks exclusively to the echo about his life and future. Is it really easy to break 15 minutes for 5,000m? Are PBs really irrelevant? And crucially, is he really on his way out of Loughborough?
"Pete Matthews is a difficult man to ignore" George Gandy once pondered "but it is well worth the effort if you try". And so who was this man of whom so many people speak so lowly? There is no question that he is the most famous athlete in the country never to have broken 4 minutes for 1500m and the former GB International (Mountain Running) is not ashamed of it. "When I was a lad" said the red head "I was taught that it didn't matter what people said about you, just as long as they were talking about you."
This is certainly the case. When displaced LSAC skipper Ben Snowball asked listeners to his radio show to text in their favourite joke, 99% of the replies featured Matthews' name in some form. "It's obvious isn't it?" said Matthews tucking into a third slice of cake "people fear me or are jealous of me." Snowball and Matthews have a difficult history after the disgraced AAAs fraudster failed to finish the BUCS A race just days before recording a personal best for 5k. "I was angry with Ben about that" said Matthews of the echo interview Snowball gave "I raced BUCS on the agreement that it was better for me to be injured than to finish low down. I never went back on that".
So what does the summer hold? "PBs are irrelevant" said Matthews ordering a doughnut "for me it's about how many races you win. I have achieved far more in the sport than some guys who are running low 3:40s for 1500m". Matthews was coy on what he thought he could achieve, but refused to rule out qualifying for the AAAs U23 Championships as of right this year rather than fictionalising his PB. It is thought that he may even attempt to break 4 minutes for 1500m.
Finally, the big question: where next? "I can't say for sure" smiled Matthews looking up from his hot chocolate "I know George doesn't want me here [in Loughborough] and so who knows - maybe I'll stick it out".
Branded a 'national joke' by his peers, lambasted by his coaches and ignored by selectors. The Blackburn Harrier talks exclusively to the echo about his life and future. Is it really easy to break 15 minutes for 5,000m? Are PBs really irrelevant? And crucially, is he really on his way out of Loughborough?
"Pete Matthews is a difficult man to ignore" George Gandy once pondered "but it is well worth the effort if you try". And so who was this man of whom so many people speak so lowly? There is no question that he is the most famous athlete in the country never to have broken 4 minutes for 1500m and the former GB International (Mountain Running) is not ashamed of it. "When I was a lad" said the red head "I was taught that it didn't matter what people said about you, just as long as they were talking about you."
This is certainly the case. When displaced LSAC skipper Ben Snowball asked listeners to his radio show to text in their favourite joke, 99% of the replies featured Matthews' name in some form. "It's obvious isn't it?" said Matthews tucking into a third slice of cake "people fear me or are jealous of me." Snowball and Matthews have a difficult history after the disgraced AAAs fraudster failed to finish the BUCS A race just days before recording a personal best for 5k. "I was angry with Ben about that" said Matthews of the echo interview Snowball gave "I raced BUCS on the agreement that it was better for me to be injured than to finish low down. I never went back on that".
So what does the summer hold? "PBs are irrelevant" said Matthews ordering a doughnut "for me it's about how many races you win. I have achieved far more in the sport than some guys who are running low 3:40s for 1500m". Matthews was coy on what he thought he could achieve, but refused to rule out qualifying for the AAAs U23 Championships as of right this year rather than fictionalising his PB. It is thought that he may even attempt to break 4 minutes for 1500m.
Finally, the big question: where next? "I can't say for sure" smiled Matthews looking up from his hot chocolate "I know George doesn't want me here [in Loughborough] and so who knows - maybe I'll stick it out".
Monday, 2 May 2011
LOUGHBOROUGH 'ARROGANCE' ANGERS BULDARO
Bud Buldaro has called on BUCS chiefs to hand Loughborough "severe sanctions" after what he called "unbelievable" scenes at today's BUCS Championship. Birmingham's top man was left seething after African Violet fans invaded the track in the wake of a sensational 4x400m victory thus confirming Loughborough's retention of the BUCS title for another year. "We hadn't even seen the photo finish" thundered an irate Buldaro "how can they do that? It's very poor". The usually composed Buldaro added that he "would be ashamed" of his team if they behaved in such a manner.
Buldaro also denied that he felt any pressure having failed to deliver the title yet again. "The fact is that we won the BUCS Cross" he snapped "it's a work in progress. I'm here to knock Loughborough off that bloody high horse they stand on once and for all." Buldaro refused to criticise his athletes and dismissed allegations that they had "let him down" and "bottled the big occasion". "You look all over the park and the guys are getting into good positions" said Buldaro "I thought we showed great character in the face of some very strange officiating today and throughout the weekend".
Birmingham fans flooded radio phone ins on the way home pleading with Buldaro to spend some money to firm up his ailing squad. "We look at our sprinters and that's where we lose it" said a lifelong fan "I can't keep watching us throw competitions like this away because we can't sprint. I know Bud has the money and now it's time to spend some". Other fans laughed at their Director's remarks that they could capture the title in 12 months time: "we're so far off it right now, I could cry" said a season ticket holder.
Meanwhile, Guru George Gandy hailed a "magnificent effort" from his Loughborough team. Gandy was barred from Bedford after being handed a touchline ban for his remarks following the BUCS Cross Country. "Everyone stepped up" beamed Gandy from Font Romeu "it was a superb display. To see people like Stephen Emery and Ryan McLeod continue to achieve despite their advancing years is a credit to their professionalism". Gandy dismissed Buldaro's comments as "bad sportsmanship". "Bud has always been a bad loser" sighed the Guru "I don't think it sets a good example to be honest, but there is not a lot you can do about it".
Buldaro also denied that he felt any pressure having failed to deliver the title yet again. "The fact is that we won the BUCS Cross" he snapped "it's a work in progress. I'm here to knock Loughborough off that bloody high horse they stand on once and for all." Buldaro refused to criticise his athletes and dismissed allegations that they had "let him down" and "bottled the big occasion". "You look all over the park and the guys are getting into good positions" said Buldaro "I thought we showed great character in the face of some very strange officiating today and throughout the weekend".
Birmingham fans flooded radio phone ins on the way home pleading with Buldaro to spend some money to firm up his ailing squad. "We look at our sprinters and that's where we lose it" said a lifelong fan "I can't keep watching us throw competitions like this away because we can't sprint. I know Bud has the money and now it's time to spend some". Other fans laughed at their Director's remarks that they could capture the title in 12 months time: "we're so far off it right now, I could cry" said a season ticket holder.
Meanwhile, Guru George Gandy hailed a "magnificent effort" from his Loughborough team. Gandy was barred from Bedford after being handed a touchline ban for his remarks following the BUCS Cross Country. "Everyone stepped up" beamed Gandy from Font Romeu "it was a superb display. To see people like Stephen Emery and Ryan McLeod continue to achieve despite their advancing years is a credit to their professionalism". Gandy dismissed Buldaro's comments as "bad sportsmanship". "Bud has always been a bad loser" sighed the Guru "I don't think it sets a good example to be honest, but there is not a lot you can do about it".
Friday, 1 April 2011
DONALDSON APRIL FOOLS PRANK BACKFIRES
Alasdair Donaldson has been arrested for wasting police time after telling John Nutall that "there was a bomb underneath his car". Loughborough's HiPAC was surrounded by Police from first thing this morning and air traffic at East Midlands airport had to be diverted. Meanwhile, the M1 was closed from Junction 22 to 23A until the all clear was given late in the afternoon. The motorway is still at a standstill now as a result.
It is understood that George Gandy's PA (who does not have time to read this blog) told fellow assistant Nutall that he "had seen George put it [the bomb] there" and that it was "armed to go off if [Nutall] opened the door". Horrified, Nutall dialed 999 and the incident escalated from there. Matters were not helped when George Gandy did not answer his mobile phone and Donaldson (now seemingly on a roll) told them it was "because he was in a meeting with terrorists".
Police bomb disposal experts discharged a controlled explosion of a crisp packet at around noon and it was then that Donaldson was taken into custody. It is understood that the incident is likely to have cost in excess of £5m and the Chief Constable of Leicestershire Police slammed blasted Donaldson's actions. "Totally irresponsible" thundered the top cop "he may have done pranks like this when he was in school, but not in the real world. I know that he is an apprentice and if I was Lord Sugar, I'd be saying 'you're fired'!"
It is unlikely that this latest gaffe from Donaldson will go down very well with UKA, however a source refused to speculate on "the future of any members of the admin team". Last year, Gandy himself was forced to apologise after upsetting the whole of Portugal by telling them that "the Spanish were coming to get them". Donaldson will have to hope that the authorities are equally kind to him.
It is understood that George Gandy's PA (who does not have time to read this blog) told fellow assistant Nutall that he "had seen George put it [the bomb] there" and that it was "armed to go off if [Nutall] opened the door". Horrified, Nutall dialed 999 and the incident escalated from there. Matters were not helped when George Gandy did not answer his mobile phone and Donaldson (now seemingly on a roll) told them it was "because he was in a meeting with terrorists".
Police bomb disposal experts discharged a controlled explosion of a crisp packet at around noon and it was then that Donaldson was taken into custody. It is understood that the incident is likely to have cost in excess of £5m and the Chief Constable of Leicestershire Police slammed blasted Donaldson's actions. "Totally irresponsible" thundered the top cop "he may have done pranks like this when he was in school, but not in the real world. I know that he is an apprentice and if I was Lord Sugar, I'd be saying 'you're fired'!"
It is unlikely that this latest gaffe from Donaldson will go down very well with UKA, however a source refused to speculate on "the future of any members of the admin team". Last year, Gandy himself was forced to apologise after upsetting the whole of Portugal by telling them that "the Spanish were coming to get them". Donaldson will have to hope that the authorities are equally kind to him.
Monday, 28 March 2011
IS CAPELLO TO BLAME FOR DISTANCE RUNNING SLUMP?
Fabio Capello is tonight facing accusations that he is "single handedly killing British athletics". UKA have confirmed that they are set to file a law suit against the under fire England football manager for "undoubtedly being responsible for everything that is wrong with the sport". The Italian - who is also alleged to have caused the financial crisis - has denied any wrongdoing but this is unlikely to cut any ice with a rampaging Ian Stewart.
"We have investigated the matter fully" said Stewart's Deputy Director of Swearing Affairs (North West Region) "and it is all his [Capello's] fault. The miserable way in which he is leading the football team is definitely impacting how our runners are performing." England currently sit atop their European qualifying group, but this is not enough for UKA. "They should be winning every game by at least 10 goals" continued the spokesman "that way at least the athletes would be motivated".
Poor performances towards the back end of last summer have also been explained by the lacklustre display from England in the World Cup. "What more evidence do you need?" said George Gandy's PA, Alasdair Donaldson (who does not have time to read this site) "as soon as England started playing, everyone's heads dropped. When I was in school.....[unfortunately, the dictaphone then run out of battery]".
The UKA legal team will be asking for "at least £25m" in compensation from Capello personally. The FA will be separately sued for "recklessly" employing Capello.
"We have investigated the matter fully" said Stewart's Deputy Director of Swearing Affairs (North West Region) "and it is all his [Capello's] fault. The miserable way in which he is leading the football team is definitely impacting how our runners are performing." England currently sit atop their European qualifying group, but this is not enough for UKA. "They should be winning every game by at least 10 goals" continued the spokesman "that way at least the athletes would be motivated".
Poor performances towards the back end of last summer have also been explained by the lacklustre display from England in the World Cup. "What more evidence do you need?" said George Gandy's PA, Alasdair Donaldson (who does not have time to read this site) "as soon as England started playing, everyone's heads dropped. When I was in school.....[unfortunately, the dictaphone then run out of battery]".
The UKA legal team will be asking for "at least £25m" in compensation from Capello personally. The FA will be separately sued for "recklessly" employing Capello.
Thursday, 17 March 2011
POKING SCANDAL LEAVES HOWE ON BRINK
David Howe and Alasdair Donaldson's relationship is "beyond economical repair" after Donaldson failed to return the Canadian's Facebook 'poke'. Loughborough's assistant coach is understood to have used the feature over the weekend in a bid to show that there were no hard feelings towards George Gandy's PA after the pair clashed at the Ed Prickett Relays. Onlookers were shocked as they had to be separated in a row over Donaldson's cap.
"David is absolutely gutted" said a source close to the academic "he really thought he had a kindred spirit in Alasdair and that together they could take the reigns when Mr Gandy stands down. He is seriously thinking about moving on now." It is not the first time that Donaldson has found himself in hot water over Facebook usage. The tea and coffee man was fined and firmly reprimanded by UKA last year when he deleted Charles Van Commonee and just last week the Daily Mail published an interview with an enraged Dani Christmas claiming she was "ignored" on the site's chat facility.
It is thought that Gandy will look to host "clear the air" talks tomorrow, but with both parties refusing to confirm their attendance a resolution is looking increasingly unlikely. Insiders have told of how the guru is becoming "extremely frustrated with the "pathetic squabbles" between his deputies. Earlier this year, he was forced to publicly revoke John Nutall's parking privileges after he was deemed to of "maliciously" parked in the space reserved for Bill Foster. This latest dispute "could be the straw that breaks the camel's back" according to insiders and "may lead to an embarrassing dismissal" before the week is out.
"David is absolutely gutted" said a source close to the academic "he really thought he had a kindred spirit in Alasdair and that together they could take the reigns when Mr Gandy stands down. He is seriously thinking about moving on now." It is not the first time that Donaldson has found himself in hot water over Facebook usage. The tea and coffee man was fined and firmly reprimanded by UKA last year when he deleted Charles Van Commonee and just last week the Daily Mail published an interview with an enraged Dani Christmas claiming she was "ignored" on the site's chat facility.
It is thought that Gandy will look to host "clear the air" talks tomorrow, but with both parties refusing to confirm their attendance a resolution is looking increasingly unlikely. Insiders have told of how the guru is becoming "extremely frustrated with the "pathetic squabbles" between his deputies. Earlier this year, he was forced to publicly revoke John Nutall's parking privileges after he was deemed to of "maliciously" parked in the space reserved for Bill Foster. This latest dispute "could be the straw that breaks the camel's back" according to insiders and "may lead to an embarrassing dismissal" before the week is out.
Sunday, 13 February 2011
SNOWBALL SLAMS 'SELFISH' MATTHEWS
THE SUNDAY INTERVIEW: BEN SNOWBALL
IT HAS BEEN a tortuous few weeks for Ben Snowball. First, he suffered repeated calls from high profile stars to walk away from his £4m top job at LSAC, then he faced the humiliation of leading Loughborough to the worst BUCS performance in their history. Snowball inherited a mess at LSAC. With debts soaring to record levels and the leftovers of a squad ravaged by the reckless signings of his predecessors, many felt that the job was a poisoned chalice. But Snowball didn't see it like that: "I am not going to sit and here say that I thought it would be easy. But I never had any idea how bad things were and I never saw the sort of vilification I got coming. No one deserves that." A beleaguered skipper finally called it quits late last Sunday night just eight months into his contract.
"It was a really tough call" sighed Snowball, running his hand through his unkept curly hair "I feel very upset about the way I was treated - and I can honestly say that what happened at BUCS was not my fault. Hand on heart I can say that". Looking visibly tired, he then paused a moment to gather himself and took a sip of mineral water. "I think that many people need to stand up and take responsibility for what happened."
Who does Ben hold responsible for Loughborough's fall from grace? "Pete Matthews" stormed the now worked up ex-skipper "he is completely to blame. How can he drop out of a BUCS 'A' Race? How can anyone do that? I picked him in good faith and he let me down and everyone else down." Matthews was forced out of the race with injury, but rallied himself to record a personal best performance over 5k in Armagh less than a week later. "That says it all, doesn't it?" said Snowball, his face creased with rage and his hazel eyes staring straight ahead. "Either his physio is a miracle worker or he isn't a team player. I mean, this is a recovery akin to that of f****** Lazarus isn't it?" Snowball went on to reveal that he would "never be talking" to Matthews again, adding that he had on good authority that the disgraced AAAs fraudster would never be picked for a Loughborough team again. "He's a joke, a complete joke" he added.
Speaking from his swanky London hideaway, Snowball didn't stop at blasting Pete Matthews - Guru George Gandy also came in for heavy criticism. "If he's the guru then I'm worried about athletics" thundered the one-time National Cross Country (team) Champion "I expected to be blown away when I met him, but all I got was a lecture about altitude. I know it's not George's fault that Pete Matthews did what he did, but I felt like I was on my own out there - no support." Gandy famously took three days to lend his support to his captain when many ex-alumni called for him to go. There were even rumours that the guru was lining up Stephen Emery to take over. "That isn't fair, no one should have to work like that".
So, what has Snowball learned from his experience? "Never trust gingers" he concluded curtly "and take a bit of valium to get you through it. Keep smiling and carry on - I took a lot of refuge in the arms of my friends and as soon as I can show my face in public again, I will go back and see them".
In the first of a series of interviews, the Echo catches up with displaced LSAC skipper Ben Snowball just days after being forced out by angry fans. He shares his views on leadership, mud and Pete Matthews
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| GOING, GOING, GONG: Snowball collected no silverware as LSAC skipper |
IT HAS BEEN a tortuous few weeks for Ben Snowball. First, he suffered repeated calls from high profile stars to walk away from his £4m top job at LSAC, then he faced the humiliation of leading Loughborough to the worst BUCS performance in their history. Snowball inherited a mess at LSAC. With debts soaring to record levels and the leftovers of a squad ravaged by the reckless signings of his predecessors, many felt that the job was a poisoned chalice. But Snowball didn't see it like that: "I am not going to sit and here say that I thought it would be easy. But I never had any idea how bad things were and I never saw the sort of vilification I got coming. No one deserves that." A beleaguered skipper finally called it quits late last Sunday night just eight months into his contract.
"It was a really tough call" sighed Snowball, running his hand through his unkept curly hair "I feel very upset about the way I was treated - and I can honestly say that what happened at BUCS was not my fault. Hand on heart I can say that". Looking visibly tired, he then paused a moment to gather himself and took a sip of mineral water. "I think that many people need to stand up and take responsibility for what happened."
Who does Ben hold responsible for Loughborough's fall from grace? "Pete Matthews" stormed the now worked up ex-skipper "he is completely to blame. How can he drop out of a BUCS 'A' Race? How can anyone do that? I picked him in good faith and he let me down and everyone else down." Matthews was forced out of the race with injury, but rallied himself to record a personal best performance over 5k in Armagh less than a week later. "That says it all, doesn't it?" said Snowball, his face creased with rage and his hazel eyes staring straight ahead. "Either his physio is a miracle worker or he isn't a team player. I mean, this is a recovery akin to that of f****** Lazarus isn't it?" Snowball went on to reveal that he would "never be talking" to Matthews again, adding that he had on good authority that the disgraced AAAs fraudster would never be picked for a Loughborough team again. "He's a joke, a complete joke" he added.
Speaking from his swanky London hideaway, Snowball didn't stop at blasting Pete Matthews - Guru George Gandy also came in for heavy criticism. "If he's the guru then I'm worried about athletics" thundered the one-time National Cross Country (team) Champion "I expected to be blown away when I met him, but all I got was a lecture about altitude. I know it's not George's fault that Pete Matthews did what he did, but I felt like I was on my own out there - no support." Gandy famously took three days to lend his support to his captain when many ex-alumni called for him to go. There were even rumours that the guru was lining up Stephen Emery to take over. "That isn't fair, no one should have to work like that".
Sunday, 6 February 2011
BEATEN EMERY BEMOANS 'RIDICULOUS' COURSE
Stephen Emery has hit out at what he calls an "unbelievable" course for Saturday's BUCS Cross Country Championships. Emery was well beaten in the race by Nick Goolab and slumped to a disappointing 12th place, unable to hold his dismal Loughborough team together. The Coventry Godiva man was indignant in defeat however and claimed that Birmingham were "totally wrong" in selecting a course that "played right into the hands" of their top men. "What's done is done," sighed Loughborough's first counter "I can't change that now and whilst they [the rules] weren't absolutely clear going into the race- I have to live with it."
A representative for BUCS Cross Country dismissed Emery's allegations and added that the day had been a "resounding success". The spokesperson went on, "we have had many many emails praising our efforts on the day. There were a few issues with parking and that is something we will address in later years." When asked to respond to Emery's comments about the decision to "ditch the ditch", the spokesman said that it had been a "safety decision". "If someone fell and hurt themselves, we could never live with it" said the source "we had no choice but to take it out. There were some really, really poor runners out there today".
Emery, however, is incandescent. When asked when he would next be competing, the 3:48 1500m man looked away. "It's really upsetting when something like this happens" said the clearly tired engineer "I have come to trust the rules, the authorities and then an incident like this ruins all of that. Who knows whether I'll bother again, I'm just really hurting right now". Emery went on to add that he felt he would have "won comfortably" on the standard course. "I have been successful there time and time again and suddenly they change it. My question is why? What are they scared of?"
Emery's comments will come as a relief to under-fire LSAC captain Ben Snowball. Radio phone-ins were inundated with angry Loughborough fans yesterday evening demanding the skipper's "immediate resignation". One caller said that the performance was "the worst in history" and that Snowball should "do the decent thing". "He's hanging on for the payout, that much is clear" said the lifetime season ticket holder "we can't go on like this". Snowball would stand to gain £4m if his contract was terminated. Although not explicitly stating support for Snowball, many inside LSAC have not been so quick to criticise. George Gandy chose to blame David Howe yesterday evening and with Emery now citing "obviously biassed" officiating, Snowball might just be able to fight on for another week.
A representative for BUCS Cross Country dismissed Emery's allegations and added that the day had been a "resounding success". The spokesperson went on, "we have had many many emails praising our efforts on the day. There were a few issues with parking and that is something we will address in later years." When asked to respond to Emery's comments about the decision to "ditch the ditch", the spokesman said that it had been a "safety decision". "If someone fell and hurt themselves, we could never live with it" said the source "we had no choice but to take it out. There were some really, really poor runners out there today".
Emery, however, is incandescent. When asked when he would next be competing, the 3:48 1500m man looked away. "It's really upsetting when something like this happens" said the clearly tired engineer "I have come to trust the rules, the authorities and then an incident like this ruins all of that. Who knows whether I'll bother again, I'm just really hurting right now". Emery went on to add that he felt he would have "won comfortably" on the standard course. "I have been successful there time and time again and suddenly they change it. My question is why? What are they scared of?"
Emery's comments will come as a relief to under-fire LSAC captain Ben Snowball. Radio phone-ins were inundated with angry Loughborough fans yesterday evening demanding the skipper's "immediate resignation". One caller said that the performance was "the worst in history" and that Snowball should "do the decent thing". "He's hanging on for the payout, that much is clear" said the lifetime season ticket holder "we can't go on like this". Snowball would stand to gain £4m if his contract was terminated. Although not explicitly stating support for Snowball, many inside LSAC have not been so quick to criticise. George Gandy chose to blame David Howe yesterday evening and with Emery now citing "obviously biassed" officiating, Snowball might just be able to fight on for another week.
Saturday, 5 February 2011
HOWE TO BLAME FOR LOUGHBOROUGH DEMISE: GANDY
David Howe is responsible for "the worst period in Loughborough's history" according to George Gandy. The guru was quick to point the finger at the Canadian after his team's men slumped to their worst ever BUCS performance this afternoon.
As bating journalists waited for Ben Snowball to explain his side's extraordinarily limp display, they were met with a rampaging Gandy who dismissed claims that Snowball was to be sacked later this evening. "I will be looking to shake things up," said Gandy "but if anything, it is David [Howe] who needs replacing". Gandy pointed out that Loughborough have not been successful in winning an 'A' Team event since Howe's arrival in 2007.
"David just brings this negative vibe to the club - I think it's his voice" sighed a clearly exasperated guru "it has been a very long day, made all the longer by my having to spend time with David." For his part, Howe has said that all his athletes performed well. "In my opinion, it's Donaldson's fault" claimed the academic "since he turned up, everything has gone wrong. We're all fed up with his stories and I bet all the guys were distracted."
Mr Donaldson - who does not have time to read this site - was not available for comment this evening, but with Gandy promising a "comprehensive investigation" into what went wrong in Birmingham, it is unlikely he will remain silent for long. Snowball will not address the media until a scheduled news conference tomorrow afternoon.
As bating journalists waited for Ben Snowball to explain his side's extraordinarily limp display, they were met with a rampaging Gandy who dismissed claims that Snowball was to be sacked later this evening. "I will be looking to shake things up," said Gandy "but if anything, it is David [Howe] who needs replacing". Gandy pointed out that Loughborough have not been successful in winning an 'A' Team event since Howe's arrival in 2007.
"David just brings this negative vibe to the club - I think it's his voice" sighed a clearly exasperated guru "it has been a very long day, made all the longer by my having to spend time with David." For his part, Howe has said that all his athletes performed well. "In my opinion, it's Donaldson's fault" claimed the academic "since he turned up, everything has gone wrong. We're all fed up with his stories and I bet all the guys were distracted."
Mr Donaldson - who does not have time to read this site - was not available for comment this evening, but with Gandy promising a "comprehensive investigation" into what went wrong in Birmingham, it is unlikely he will remain silent for long. Snowball will not address the media until a scheduled news conference tomorrow afternoon.
Saturday, 29 January 2011
HAPLESS SNOWBALL SLAMMED OVER BUS GAFFE
As if fielding the weakest Loughborough team in a generation wasn't bad enough for Ben Snowball, the LSAC skipper now faces a mutiny from furious stars as he broke the news that the bus for BUCS would be leaving at 8:30 am. "This is beyond a joke now" thundered Gary Bradbury "you just can't run a club like this. Who does he think he is? I don't plan on being awake at 8:30 let alone on a bus. It's absolutely outrageous". Bradbury is just one of a number of athletes demanding that the departure time is put back or else they will "seriously consider" strike action.
In a bid to placate the masses, Snowball asked George Gandy's PA - Alasdair Donaldson (who does not have time to read this site) - to send out word that it is "imperative" to get the bus under way early. However, an insider told the Echo that this only exasperated matters when Donaldson made his announcement at Wednesday night circuits. "The crowd went mental" said the source "they started shouting expletives and all threw chewing gum at Alasdair. I have never seen such anger".
This is the latest in a long line of blunders from LSAC's inexperienced leader that have led to many asking whether he should be replaced ahead of the crucial season run in. Earlier this month, Paula Radcliffe called on Snowball to buck his ideas up and now Lord Sebastian Coe has added his voice to his growing list of detractors. "It's a tough job that one" said his Lordship "the fans have such expectations and I am not sure Ben is cut out for captaining such a big club. He is more suited to a mid-range team such as Oxford or Bath".
LSAC chiefs were refusing to comment last night, but rumours persist that George Gandy is lining up Stephen Emery to take over on a caretaker basis until the end of the season.
Saturday, 22 January 2011
GANDY TO RESIGN OVER MATTHEWS SELECTION
Loughborough Athletics club has been plunged into turmoil this evening after its director, George Gandy announced that he would resign as he "had no option" but to select Pete Matthews for the 'A' Team at the forthcoming BUCS Cross Country Championships. "I have had some dark moments in my career" said the Guru from a hastily arranged press conference "but this is as low as it has come. It is a very sad day and I must say I never thought it would come to this".
Loughborough insiders have revealed how Gandy "had an almighty row" at the selection meeting last night and was seen storming out of the HiPac shortly after 10pm. Alasdair Donaldson - who does not have time to read this site - attempted to go after him carrying a freshly made cup of tea but was unable to talk the Guru round. "His mind is made up" said the source "George is just so embarrassed that he has to pick Matthews that he can't carry on. He said that the buck stops with him and he is intent on going over it".
Matthews has not been without his problems in the past twelve months. It was not long ago that the Lufbra Echo revealed that he had no future in the East Midlands and many are stunned that the disgraced AAAs fraudster has been included in the first wave of selection. "It's a horrible day for Loughborough" said a season ticket holder "it is a mark of how bad things have got. I doubt we'll get in the top 10 now - we certainly don't deserve to." The Echo understands that the team at Loughborough have "done all they can" to avoid selecting Matthews including begging his academic department to terminate - or at least suspend - his studies. "In the end, he was the only choice" continued a senior aide to the Guru "it devalues the rich history that this institution has".
Gandy will vacate his post at 0600 on Monday paving the way for Alasdair Donaldson to take caretaker charge of the club. Loughborough chiefs have stressed that this is "an extremely temporary measure" and that Gandy's current PA will "never be left unsupervised" with the club. The recruitment process to find Gandy's successor will start immediately and not include the Scot who will revert to his tea-making role once someone is in post. Bookmakers have tipped Birmingham's top man Bud Buldaro for the job, but have refused to rule out what would be a sensational promotion for out of favour St Mary's chief, Mick Woods.
Loughborough insiders have revealed how Gandy "had an almighty row" at the selection meeting last night and was seen storming out of the HiPac shortly after 10pm. Alasdair Donaldson - who does not have time to read this site - attempted to go after him carrying a freshly made cup of tea but was unable to talk the Guru round. "His mind is made up" said the source "George is just so embarrassed that he has to pick Matthews that he can't carry on. He said that the buck stops with him and he is intent on going over it".
Matthews has not been without his problems in the past twelve months. It was not long ago that the Lufbra Echo revealed that he had no future in the East Midlands and many are stunned that the disgraced AAAs fraudster has been included in the first wave of selection. "It's a horrible day for Loughborough" said a season ticket holder "it is a mark of how bad things have got. I doubt we'll get in the top 10 now - we certainly don't deserve to." The Echo understands that the team at Loughborough have "done all they can" to avoid selecting Matthews including begging his academic department to terminate - or at least suspend - his studies. "In the end, he was the only choice" continued a senior aide to the Guru "it devalues the rich history that this institution has".
Gandy will vacate his post at 0600 on Monday paving the way for Alasdair Donaldson to take caretaker charge of the club. Loughborough chiefs have stressed that this is "an extremely temporary measure" and that Gandy's current PA will "never be left unsupervised" with the club. The recruitment process to find Gandy's successor will start immediately and not include the Scot who will revert to his tea-making role once someone is in post. Bookmakers have tipped Birmingham's top man Bud Buldaro for the job, but have refused to rule out what would be a sensational promotion for out of favour St Mary's chief, Mick Woods.
Saturday, 15 January 2011
HOWE FACES UKA CHARGE
David Howe is likely to face a lengthy touchline ban and heavy fine after being 'sent to the car' at this afternoon's Birmingham League Division One meeting at Coventry. The Loughborough Assistant Coach was dismissed by the match referee after constantly berating officials over what he called a "laughable piece of marshalling". Howe was left seething when the organisers slightly tweaked the course from previous years in order to maximise the conditions. The Canadian was given his marching orders roughly three minutes into the second half of the race after an altercation with the fourth official.
UKA have confirmed that he will be handed an automatic three race suspension after seeing red, but could face a further charge of "using foul and abusive language" that could lead to a ban of up to 12 weeks. Speaking after the race, Howe conceded that he had "spoken out of turn" by resisted any suggestion that he had used bad language. "That isn't something I would do," said Howe "I admit that I was upset at the way the match was going. I think that it was a bit big for the race referee to be honest, but I should have kept those thoughts to myself."
In a move that is unlikely to win him any friends at UKA, the academic added that he was "becoming increasingly concerned" at the weak officiating seen at recent events. His comments come just days after Bud Buldaro voiced worries over the degree to which officials were influenced by Guru Gandy in the run up to BUCS. "If anything decisions seem to go against us" said Howe "I am not sure how Bud can say that. It is no secret that UKA officials seem to have it in for Loughborough and Loughborough athletes - you just need to look at the way Lewis Moses was treated in the summer. It's very poor and I think it confirms that we need to have another look at race officiating."
UKA have confirmed that he will be handed an automatic three race suspension after seeing red, but could face a further charge of "using foul and abusive language" that could lead to a ban of up to 12 weeks. Speaking after the race, Howe conceded that he had "spoken out of turn" by resisted any suggestion that he had used bad language. "That isn't something I would do," said Howe "I admit that I was upset at the way the match was going. I think that it was a bit big for the race referee to be honest, but I should have kept those thoughts to myself."
In a move that is unlikely to win him any friends at UKA, the academic added that he was "becoming increasingly concerned" at the weak officiating seen at recent events. His comments come just days after Bud Buldaro voiced worries over the degree to which officials were influenced by Guru Gandy in the run up to BUCS. "If anything decisions seem to go against us" said Howe "I am not sure how Bud can say that. It is no secret that UKA officials seem to have it in for Loughborough and Loughborough athletes - you just need to look at the way Lewis Moses was treated in the summer. It's very poor and I think it confirms that we need to have another look at race officiating."
Monday, 10 January 2011
NEWS ROUND UP
BULDARO CALLS FOR "STRONGER" OFFICIALS AT BUCS
Birmingham Director of Athletics has called on UKA and BUCS to clamp down on what he calls the "blatant bating of the officials" by fierce rival George Gandy. Buldaro - who is looking to defend the BUCS title on home soil - has said that he is concerned that some "strange" comments from the Guru and Director at Loughborough will sway race stewards on the day. "Look, we all know that the officials have a really really tough job" said Buldaro from a press conference "and they are not helped by certain Directors constantly railing against them. That is a fact. I only hope they can put it out of their minds on the day." For his part, the Guru issued a statement calling the accusations "ludicrous" adding that "they [the remarks] were a sign of the pressure Bud is under".
Chris Thompson faces a spell on the sidelines after being "seriously scratched" by his pet cat, Jemma. The European Silver Medallist required hospital treatment after the cat pounced on him shortly after being fed her breakfast. A spokesman for the athlete said that it was "unlikely" to effect his training too greatly adding that Jemma would be dispatched for a "full claw clipping" and that he hoped that this would help the news desk on a slow day.
EIGHTLANE SILENT ON MCLEOD RUN
Always known to be even handed with their criticism popular running forum for the intellectually challenged, Eightlane have remained eerily and surprisingly quiet on Ryan McLeod's eleventh place (3rd Brit home) at the Edinburgh Cross Country event held last weekend. High praise was lauded on many who fell short of one of the best performances of McLeod's career. One can be sure it is nothing to do with the fact that the very same forum frothed with rage at McLeod's inclusion in the European Cross Country team just last month with one poster wondering whether UKA were getting "value for money" with McLeod's recent trip to Kenya.
Friday, 7 January 2011
WEEK IN PICTURES
NORTH KOREA SHOCK
GANDY IN DATE RIDDLE
2012 OLYMPICS UPDATE
* Editor's Note: Mr Donaldson does not have the time to read this site.
Saturday, 1 January 2011
SEAWARD TO BE FINED OVER NEW YEAR SHAME
George Gandy has confirmed that Kevin Seaward is likely to be fined by LSAC after being caught by police with a blood alcohol level of zero. The former Irish International was arrested shortly after 3:30am for being neither drunk nor remotely disorderly and is now having to explain to LSAC chiefs why he was "a shit lad". Gandy was awoken early this morning by PA Alasdair Donaldson (who does not have time to read this blog) and demanded immediate talks with Seaward who compounded his shocking behaviour the night before by being "on a run" when the call came through.
"Kevin would have done well to follow the example of Pete Matthews" said an insider at the HiPac "he kept up his extraordinary record of pulling unwilling and rotund girls and even managed to irritate just about everyone he came into contact with." High praise also came for Stephen Emery, who told shocked bystanders that he was a "dead cert" for the next six Birmingham Leagues. "Emery really let himself go last night" said the source "it was good to see, although we don't actively encourage pretending that bar tables are podiums, it is better than doing nothing at all."
Seaward has remained largely silent today, although he did use his Twitter feed to reveal that he had "a meeting with the boss". The Belfast man continued: "just heading off now, scary stuff!" Sources close to him have revealed that he is "upset with himself more than anything" for failing to mount a respectable showing. "Kevin freely admits that his story telling is at its strongest after a few drinks" said the friend "he wanted to try it sober and we all now agree that it failed miserably. He is looking forward to being able to prove himself at the next available opportunity."
"Kevin would have done well to follow the example of Pete Matthews" said an insider at the HiPac "he kept up his extraordinary record of pulling unwilling and rotund girls and even managed to irritate just about everyone he came into contact with." High praise also came for Stephen Emery, who told shocked bystanders that he was a "dead cert" for the next six Birmingham Leagues. "Emery really let himself go last night" said the source "it was good to see, although we don't actively encourage pretending that bar tables are podiums, it is better than doing nothing at all."
Seaward has remained largely silent today, although he did use his Twitter feed to reveal that he had "a meeting with the boss". The Belfast man continued: "just heading off now, scary stuff!" Sources close to him have revealed that he is "upset with himself more than anything" for failing to mount a respectable showing. "Kevin freely admits that his story telling is at its strongest after a few drinks" said the friend "he wanted to try it sober and we all now agree that it failed miserably. He is looking forward to being able to prove himself at the next available opportunity."
Friday, 24 December 2010
THE GURU'S CHRISTMAS MESSAGE - 2010
People of Loughborough, UKA and beyond,
I write to you from my Guru retreat far from the constant gaze of media attention and the miserable snow that has ground the British people down. Rest assured that the sun is peaking over the horizon as I sip from my Guru cocktail supplied to me by my Guru aides, all the time watched over by my Guru security team.
2010 has been a difficult year for us all. We have had the horrors of debt at LSAC to deal with, the nightmare of the kit scandal and above all, the hiring of a new tea boy - Alasdair Donaldson (who doesn't have time to read that fantastic Lufbra Echo) . I realise now what a dreadful mistake that was - but you have to understand that he made a very good case for himself when I interviewed him and spoke glowingly about his time at school. Alas, his tea is too weak and his emails require constant correction. The whistle at sessions (rather than my grandly shouts) was the final straw for me and Alasdair and I are set for "crisis talks" if you will, early in the New Year.
Many people have asked me about why I took the executive (and extraordinary) decision to scrap the LSAC Grass Session this year. Indeed, I have a letter right here in front of me from Joanna Lumley (she of Gurkha fame) demanding to know why "the little people" of the grass have been treated "so very badly". Well the truth is that I worked out that getting rid of the grass session was the best possible way of annoying David Howe and so went ahead with it. I must say the results have been very pleasing indeed!
To close off LSAC affairs, I turn my attention to Director Dakin who has continued in his capacity as Director of Coaching. There has been some debate over whether Director Dakin is my superior or not. This is a ridiculous and futile discussion. How can a mere 'coach' outrank a Guru? Just because Director Dakin has a big plush office that is separate from the rest of the team, you all think that he is the number one around here. Nonsense. I chose to be in the open plan area because I am confident in my position. I do not need that status of a personal office to make me feel adequate. It is a great shame that Director Dakin is so petulant about this and we are all getting sick of his hissy fits and door slamming pantomimes. The truth is that he is jealous of my Guru status, but it was not me who failed his Fellowship of the Royal College of Gurus entrance exams now was it? I aced mine years ago and he simply lacks the experience. In all honesty, he shouldn't really be a director at all and we only gave him that to stop his whining all the time.
On the UK Athletics front, we have seen unprecedented success this year. I have just had the pleasure of spending some time with successful contestants in the "Race to Portugal" competition that was UKA's initiative to select the team for the European Cross Country Championships. It was such a shame that I had to push Andy Vernon and James Wilkinson off the cliff because the disappointed me so. Only joking! That would be a direct breach of the Guru Handbook, Section 22, Paragraph 6: "Never, under any circumstances, intentionally push, throw or in any way encourage an athlete - underachiever or otherwise - to fall from a cliff".
In all seriousness, it has been quite a year. So good to see that Chirs Thompson and Mo Farah have made up after that pathetic spat over Mo stealing from Chris. It was a real shame that Chris had to bring that up in the middle of a live BBC interview with Godfather Inverdale, but I am afraid that it only demonstrative of 'Thommo's' lack of class. Of course, I have been single handedly responsible for the turn around in Distance Running success this year and so I think we should all collectively (and metaphorically) pat me on the back: WELL DONE MR GURU, SIR! I can't wait to watch the World Championships in Berlin again (Seoul will probably be called off because I am about to declare war on South Korea on behalf of my Northern comrades), but I will be personally ensuring that Alasdair tears up that horrid blue track.
Here's to yet more success in 2011, and to hoping that I finally get Charles Van Commenee's job that I richly deserve!
Warmest Regards to you all (you certainly need them!)
NJoy!
Guru George Gandy FRCG
Friday, 17 December 2010
LORD GURU GANDY SET TO NAME APPRENTICE
The climax of "the job interview from hell" is to be reached this weekend as the Guru reveals the chosen one - and winner of a three figure salary - from the two remaining candidates. Alasdair Donaldson and David Howe have beaten off the competition of thousands and a twelve month selection process in order to go head to head in the final. Donaldson - who does not have the time to read this blog - has five times been in the firing line and has the poorer record of the two. Canadian Howe, meanwhile, only came unstuck in the Craig Mottram task when his athlete was nearly lapped by the Australian.
"Alasdair has shown great passion and tenacity" explained the Guru to a the BBC's One Show, "he has a lot to learn but if he was prepared to listen, I am sure we could do something with him." Donaldson has been a controversial figure from the start and was almost immediately sent packing when he project managed the disastrous Portugal task. On that occasion, he was able to convince the Guru of his "huge potential" and passed the blame on to the "virtually absent" John Nutall who was fired. The Fife man then went on to record some big wins - most notably in the Circuit Session task where he scrapped the conventional method of calling out time every 30 seconds for an automated watch and then again in the Emailing task, where he sent all of the Guru's emails out in the quickest time.
"David is more a safe pair of hands" said the Guru of Howe "he has been round the block a few times, but I am concerned about his maverick tendencies." Howe was lucky to escape in Portugal after his team recorded a narrow victory. However, the Middle Saturday task led to him being heavily criticised by Ian Anholm - one of his Lordship's aides - for spiking the drink of one his athletes in a bid to help him relax. Howe shone in the Winter Session task when he "rolled the dice" in opting to go ahead with a grass session despite explicit instructions to do otherwise. Howe was also praised for a "spark of brilliance" when opting to ignore the fact that one of his athletes had tripped and fallen in a 1500m race. Calling it "a moment of true intuition" the Guru immediately put the Canadian through to the latter stages much to the ire of Bill Foster, with whom Howe has regularly clashed. Foster was fired after the Easy Run task went wrong and some of his athletes were spotted running sub-5 minute miles - something that Foster claims was "David's idea".
The final task sees the two finalists really put through their paces as they both pitch to the Guru their ideas for his 'Office Expansion Project.' The winner will be rewarded with a seat in the corner of the new office and the dream opportunity of making Lord Gandy's tea.
"Alasdair has shown great passion and tenacity" explained the Guru to a the BBC's One Show, "he has a lot to learn but if he was prepared to listen, I am sure we could do something with him." Donaldson has been a controversial figure from the start and was almost immediately sent packing when he project managed the disastrous Portugal task. On that occasion, he was able to convince the Guru of his "huge potential" and passed the blame on to the "virtually absent" John Nutall who was fired. The Fife man then went on to record some big wins - most notably in the Circuit Session task where he scrapped the conventional method of calling out time every 30 seconds for an automated watch and then again in the Emailing task, where he sent all of the Guru's emails out in the quickest time.
"David is more a safe pair of hands" said the Guru of Howe "he has been round the block a few times, but I am concerned about his maverick tendencies." Howe was lucky to escape in Portugal after his team recorded a narrow victory. However, the Middle Saturday task led to him being heavily criticised by Ian Anholm - one of his Lordship's aides - for spiking the drink of one his athletes in a bid to help him relax. Howe shone in the Winter Session task when he "rolled the dice" in opting to go ahead with a grass session despite explicit instructions to do otherwise. Howe was also praised for a "spark of brilliance" when opting to ignore the fact that one of his athletes had tripped and fallen in a 1500m race. Calling it "a moment of true intuition" the Guru immediately put the Canadian through to the latter stages much to the ire of Bill Foster, with whom Howe has regularly clashed. Foster was fired after the Easy Run task went wrong and some of his athletes were spotted running sub-5 minute miles - something that Foster claims was "David's idea".
The final task sees the two finalists really put through their paces as they both pitch to the Guru their ideas for his 'Office Expansion Project.' The winner will be rewarded with a seat in the corner of the new office and the dream opportunity of making Lord Gandy's tea.
Tuesday, 14 December 2010
EMERY 'FED UP' WITH LOUGHBOROUGH REGIME
Stephen Emery could be on the brink of a shock move to Birmingham after telling his advisers not to enter into discussions about the renewal of his contract at Loughborough. The 3:48 1500m man is said to be "very upset" after not receiving a personal email of congratulations from Guru George Gandy after his recent Birmingham League success and has always had a soft spot for the velvet tongued Bud Buldaro. The Lufbra Echo also understands that Emery is still furious about the new arrangements surrounding physio vouchers that have been introduced by a rampaging Ian Anholm. The Director of Administrative Affairs (Upstairs Office) has limited all athletes to just five vouchers per term and Emery has slammed this decision as "unreasonable" and is rumoured to have left a "stroppy note" on Anholm's car windscreen.
"Stephen is tired at the moment" sighed a seemingly unconcerned George Gandy from his weekly press conference "I am sure that this is the hours of stretching are taking their toll and in the new year he will be refreshed and ready to commit his future to us." The fact that a possible Emery defection is headline news only serves to underline how far the unfancied engineer has come in the past eighteen months. Written off by many, Emery was criticised for his "handlebars" by assistant coach David Howe just over a year ago and was on the brink of being "moved on" from the club after a dismal summer campaign in 2009. Since then, the Coventry Godiva man has become a linchpin in Gandy's squad and however much LSAC protest otherwise, his loss would be catastrophic in the run up to the BUCS Cross Country Championships.
An Emery spokesman was keen to play down the rumours this evening and was instead focussing on the "ludicrous" decision by Pete Matthews to grow a pony tail for the aforementioned BUCS. "If anything it is Mr Matthews that is forcing Stephen to consider his position" said the source "living with him is an awful experience and I think anyone would get fed up of hearing about how he once medalled at the U6 National Cross Relays every single day".
Matthews is said to be growing the pony tail for "attention seeking purposes".
"Stephen is tired at the moment" sighed a seemingly unconcerned George Gandy from his weekly press conference "I am sure that this is the hours of stretching are taking their toll and in the new year he will be refreshed and ready to commit his future to us." The fact that a possible Emery defection is headline news only serves to underline how far the unfancied engineer has come in the past eighteen months. Written off by many, Emery was criticised for his "handlebars" by assistant coach David Howe just over a year ago and was on the brink of being "moved on" from the club after a dismal summer campaign in 2009. Since then, the Coventry Godiva man has become a linchpin in Gandy's squad and however much LSAC protest otherwise, his loss would be catastrophic in the run up to the BUCS Cross Country Championships.
An Emery spokesman was keen to play down the rumours this evening and was instead focussing on the "ludicrous" decision by Pete Matthews to grow a pony tail for the aforementioned BUCS. "If anything it is Mr Matthews that is forcing Stephen to consider his position" said the source "living with him is an awful experience and I think anyone would get fed up of hearing about how he once medalled at the U6 National Cross Relays every single day".
Matthews is said to be growing the pony tail for "attention seeking purposes".
Wednesday, 8 December 2010
NEWS ROUND UP
RADCLIFFE MAY RUN IN RACE SHOCK
Paula Radcliffe is "considering" competing in a race, the Lufbra Echo can exclusively reveal. The news has left many in the athletics world reeling from the shock with many scratching their heads trying to remember the last time she raced. "This is crazy" said one senior UKA source, "everyone knows that Paula is the best trainer in the world. Can she convert that into racing? I'm not sure." It is thought that the Monaco based star is targeting "at least one" race within the next year and whilst there are no guarantees that an appropriate contractual arrangement can be agreed, some say that a thrilling sequel could be seen in 2012.
GANDY SHELVES TRAINING AMID ICE CHAOS
George Gandy was forced to cancel organised training at Loughborough this week after his apprentice was unable to blow dry the track to safety. The Guru was left with no alternative but to make the "self operate" call despite nearly three hours of back breaking work from Alasdair Donaldson - who does not have time to read this site. Donaldson borrowed the hair dryer from great man himself and conceded that this was "probably not the best decision". David Howe, meanwhile, risked the wrath of the authorities by continuing to run his unsanctioned grass session. It is understood that the Canadian will be asked to explain himself in the coming months having repeatedly ignored a Guru Order on the matter.
The snow and ice has always been said to bring out the worst in Loughborough athletes and this year's crop did not disappoint. Leicestershire Police were despatched to attend to a distress call from Frank Baddick who had attempted to complete a training session on the icy Loughborough canal. The unwitting Baddick had fallen through the ice "half way through the fifth rep" after thinking it safer to train on there "rather than running the risk of turning an ankle" elsewhere. Calling the session "irresponsible" a spokesman for the Police confirmed that the 1500m star will make a full recovery.
OHURUOGU 'FORGETS' TO PAY FOR PETROL
Dappy 400m Olympic Champion, Christine Ohuruogu has been handed a £400 fine by the Metropolitan Police after failing to pay for petrol for the third time in 18 months. The quarter mile ace slammed the "ridiculously unworkable" system of payment at her local Esso Garage and pleaded that it had "completely slipped her mind" to pay for the fuel. "I fill up with petrol and am just focussed on getting back on the road" explained an unapologetic Ohuruogu, "there was no malice in the action and this fine is completely disproportionate." This is not the first time Ohuruogo's forgetful nature has got her into trouble. Earlier this year, the Londoner was fined after failing to put her recycling out for collection and she has been warned that any future misdemeanours could be dealt with "very severely".
ECHO CRITIC, THE HYPOCRITE?
"It's not funny....it's just weird" was one of the Echo's favourite detractors damning assessment of the hard hitting journalism we produce. Said critic was seething when an unwitting sub-editor (now retired) dared to lift a picture from his Facebook wall and use it in an article about Big Brother. Lack of respect and all that was the thunderous cry! Well, said individual should know all about respect given that his current Facebook profile picture shows him openly mocking world famous physicist, Stephen Hawking. This blog may not be funny, but we are not quite sure how a terminal illness is.
Paula Radcliffe is "considering" competing in a race, the Lufbra Echo can exclusively reveal. The news has left many in the athletics world reeling from the shock with many scratching their heads trying to remember the last time she raced. "This is crazy" said one senior UKA source, "everyone knows that Paula is the best trainer in the world. Can she convert that into racing? I'm not sure." It is thought that the Monaco based star is targeting "at least one" race within the next year and whilst there are no guarantees that an appropriate contractual arrangement can be agreed, some say that a thrilling sequel could be seen in 2012.
GANDY SHELVES TRAINING AMID ICE CHAOS
George Gandy was forced to cancel organised training at Loughborough this week after his apprentice was unable to blow dry the track to safety. The Guru was left with no alternative but to make the "self operate" call despite nearly three hours of back breaking work from Alasdair Donaldson - who does not have time to read this site. Donaldson borrowed the hair dryer from great man himself and conceded that this was "probably not the best decision". David Howe, meanwhile, risked the wrath of the authorities by continuing to run his unsanctioned grass session. It is understood that the Canadian will be asked to explain himself in the coming months having repeatedly ignored a Guru Order on the matter.
The snow and ice has always been said to bring out the worst in Loughborough athletes and this year's crop did not disappoint. Leicestershire Police were despatched to attend to a distress call from Frank Baddick who had attempted to complete a training session on the icy Loughborough canal. The unwitting Baddick had fallen through the ice "half way through the fifth rep" after thinking it safer to train on there "rather than running the risk of turning an ankle" elsewhere. Calling the session "irresponsible" a spokesman for the Police confirmed that the 1500m star will make a full recovery.
OHURUOGU 'FORGETS' TO PAY FOR PETROL
Dappy 400m Olympic Champion, Christine Ohuruogu has been handed a £400 fine by the Metropolitan Police after failing to pay for petrol for the third time in 18 months. The quarter mile ace slammed the "ridiculously unworkable" system of payment at her local Esso Garage and pleaded that it had "completely slipped her mind" to pay for the fuel. "I fill up with petrol and am just focussed on getting back on the road" explained an unapologetic Ohuruogu, "there was no malice in the action and this fine is completely disproportionate." This is not the first time Ohuruogo's forgetful nature has got her into trouble. Earlier this year, the Londoner was fined after failing to put her recycling out for collection and she has been warned that any future misdemeanours could be dealt with "very severely".
ECHO CRITIC, THE HYPOCRITE?
"It's not funny....it's just weird" was one of the Echo's favourite detractors damning assessment of the hard hitting journalism we produce. Said critic was seething when an unwitting sub-editor (now retired) dared to lift a picture from his Facebook wall and use it in an article about Big Brother. Lack of respect and all that was the thunderous cry! Well, said individual should know all about respect given that his current Facebook profile picture shows him openly mocking world famous physicist, Stephen Hawking. This blog may not be funny, but we are not quite sure how a terminal illness is.
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