NERVOUS EMERY HITS OUT AHEAD OF BUCS TEST

Stephen Emery has used his weekly press conference to attack "anyone who thinks they can come close" to him in next weekend's BUCS Cross Country Championships. The Loughborough man is set to lead the weakest African Violet team for decades, but has reacted angrily to any suggestion that this will phase him. "I am quite used to being the favourite" thundered a clearly on edge Emery "I am the big name at Coventry and I am the big name here. I have never bottled it before and I am not about to start now." He went on to state that it was "very unlikely" that he would be beaten on race day: "this is what it's all about - I am ready for it and I am going to smash anyone who comes in my way through a wall".

The 3:48 (Stretford Timing) 1500m man has not been without his difficulties in 2011. Despite topping the rankings for 5 miles, Emery failed to medal at his County Championships and openly admitted to being "dominated" in several key predictor sessions. "Training isn't important" he snapped performing one of his thrice daily calf exercises "racing is what matters and I am more than ready to prove my metal. Just you wait till race day - then you'll see how tough I am". Emery is not currently on speaking terms with George Gandy's PA - Alasdair Donaldson (who does not have the time to read this site) - after he accused the star of "not pushing it enough" in training. "What does he know anyway?" snarled Emery "he is a nothing to me - just a one season wonder, that is all."

Emery was forced to concede that he was "holding the Loughborough team together" but stopped short of joining Gary Bradbury in declaring himself "embarrassed" to be a part of it. "Pete [Matthews, the sixth man in the team] is a friend of mine" said Emery of the disgraced AAAs fraudster "and whilst it is distressing that he has made the team, we just have to get on with it. It's not like he is going to count anyway." The Coventry Godiva man also dismissed speculation that he would be relieving Ben Snowball of his captaincy on the day. "That is complete nonsense" he said "who told you that? Was it [Kevin] Seaward causing trouble like he always does? It's an open secret that I think Snowball is a joke, but constitutionally I can't challenge him and so won't even though I am the better athlete by some considerable distance".

HAPLESS SNOWBALL SLAMMED OVER BUS GAFFE

As if fielding the weakest Loughborough team in a generation wasn't bad enough for Ben Snowball, the LSAC skipper now faces a mutiny from furious stars as he broke the news that the bus for BUCS would be leaving at 8:30 am. "This is beyond a joke now" thundered Gary Bradbury "you just can't run a club like this. Who does he think he is? I don't plan on being awake at 8:30 let alone on a bus. It's absolutely outrageous". Bradbury is just one of a number of athletes demanding that the departure time is put back or else they will "seriously consider" strike action.

In a bid to placate the masses, Snowball asked George Gandy's PA - Alasdair Donaldson (who does not have time to read this site) - to send out word that it is "imperative" to get the bus under way early. However, an insider told the Echo that this only exasperated matters when Donaldson made his announcement at Wednesday night circuits. "The crowd went mental" said the source "they started shouting expletives and all threw chewing gum at Alasdair. I have never seen such anger".

This is the latest in a long line of blunders from LSAC's inexperienced leader that have led to many asking whether he should be replaced ahead of the crucial season run in. Earlier this month, Paula Radcliffe called on Snowball to buck his ideas up and now Lord Sebastian Coe has added his voice to his growing list of detractors. "It's a tough job that one" said his Lordship "the fans have such expectations and I am not sure Ben is cut out for captaining such a big club. He is more suited to a mid-range team such as Oxford or Bath".

LSAC chiefs were refusing to comment last night, but rumours persist that George Gandy is lining up Stephen Emery to take over on a caretaker basis until the end of the season.