David Howe’s credibility appears to be in tatters this evening after he was spotted leaving Sainsbury’s with “enough alcohol to drown George Gandy”. Shocked bystanders recall seeing the top coach marching away from the superstore with “several crates” of beer along with two large bottles of lemonade. After a difficult week for Loughborough and UKA, this latest scandal will come as a major blow. Howe was cautioned earlier this year after one of his athletes was rushed to hospital with alcohol poisoning having drunk a drink spiked by the Canadian. “It’s difficult to see a role for him now,” snarled Alasdair Donaldson (George Gandy’s PA), “I shall take over looking after David’s athletes as a temporary measure. Hopefully we’ll stop his guys from nearly getting lapped again”.
For his part, Howe has defended his actions claiming that what he does in his spare time is his own business. "I realise that being associated with the Loughborough regime means that I am a high profile figure," said the Canadian from a hideaway in the English countryside, "but if what I do away from the track is nothing to do with the wider world". Howe went on to dismiss Donaldson's comments, stating that the Scot had "a lot to learn" before he would be allowed near any of his athletes. "Who else can miss their guys falling over in a race?" thundered the world's leading authority on aggressive behaviour in snooker, "or keep them on their toes on a night out? Alasdair needs to get back to sending out George's emails".
Loughborough officials have said that the issue will not be dealt with until the regime gets rolling again at the end of the month.